Wednesday, January 21, 2009

疑似警訊

假如你被寶藥黨騙了所有身家,疑犯逃之夭夭.重遇涉案犯人,你會否抓著他衣領問 "你為什麼要作姦犯科?為甚麼香港七百萬人,你偏偏選我來騙?"

* * *
在我的圈子內,我是出了名的笨.從電腦用品到掃把到水果再到寵物用品,我一概有受騙紀錄.

被騙得最深刻那次,是跟一位六七十歲的婆婆買絲襪.我要找一對玻璃絲襪,她塞了一對深肉色絲襪給我.我心存懷疑,她立即加句 "呢隻絲襪,好好著架.你唔好見佢好似好深色,因為佢d針落得好密,就係咁先唔易花,好襟著架."

我半信半疑問 "可唔可以開黎睇下?"

婆婆答 "我係度賣左五十年絲襪,你唔信就算數.我留返黎賣比d OL熟客好過." 她頓一頓 "呢對襪,衰就衰在唔係成日返貨,賣埋呢幾對唔知幾時再有!"

見婆婆一臉認真,振振有詞,又想到她一把年紀還"屹立不倒",我以六十五元一對的價錢買了四對"好襟著"絲襪.

四對,是她說的所.有.現.貨.先不說品質如何,但那對絲襪,跟我要的玻璃絲襪,本質上相距十萬八千里.

第二天,我氣衝衝拿著三對絲襪跑去跟亞婆理論.

亞婆自信滿滿地說 "無人逼你買架窩.呢度貨物出門,恕不退換.你當我係連卡佛呀?"

我當然氣上心頭,亞婆口口聲聲"賣左五十年絲襪",DLS,幾十歲人還學人做奸商,心地還這麼不好,抵她還在街邊捱.但最好呢,還是拆招牌,免得佢繼續騙人.

但當人冷靜下來,我開始反問自己,點解相信亞婆先?點解唔買一對試下先?大拿拿六十五蚊對,因咩事一掃掃四對先?

我可以一對都唔買架窩.也可以一直怪亞婆銷售手法不誠實.可作為擁有自由意志的人,我為自己的錯誤決定負起全部責任 - 遇人不淑好,誤信蠶言也好,皆因我"願意相信".

* * *
歐晃訊,我哥兒們之一,是天生推銷員.他曾對我說,最成功的推銷員,會得在北極成功賣出冰塊.而竅門是 "Always mix vanity with insecurities to create a need for them. No one will buy ice to chill things in north pole, but maybe they'd like an ice sculpture for their parties, or maybe they want ice cube made with evian water."

"願意相信",非甚麼壞事.It's actually a beautiful quality. But first you have got to be absolutely sure about what you really need.知己之餘,也得知彼,遇上疑似正貨,緊記驗明正身後才作決定.

你抽著寶藥黨的衣領向他迫供,犯人大概會一臉無辜地回答 "親愛的,作為寶藥黨,騙人可是我的營生啊!" 寶藥黨,說穿了,不過是一名推銷員.推銷員的唯一目標,是成功賣出貨物.After sales services? It was never included in their job description.

你可以說他們無恥,但有恥之士,又豈會成為寶藥黨黨員?

可我絕不會因為被亞婆騙過,便放棄尋找我的玻璃絲襪,又或拒絕再買任何絲襪.

我們呀,都是吃過虧才學精.

就當是交學費吧!

9 comments:

小瓶子 said...

sogo 应该有你要的絲襪, 唯有买贵少少吧.

卡臣 said...

成龍都話試過那隻洗頭水才推介被人

Unreality 泡影 said...

好像是寶藥黨而不是補藥黨

寶藥黨 google result : 1,270,000

補藥黨 google result : 83,900

我只是路過多口, 沒挑剔的意思.

還有, 你的blog頗好看 :)

C+ said...

RE: 小瓶子
Thanks for the tip! I will check :)

RE: Car Sir
I guess in the end everything is no pain, no gain.

Re: Unreality
Thanks for the tip! Changed accordingly. Hope to see you every now and then :)

Hana said...

你越寫越好了。

周游 said...

完全同意Hana, 好likey!

C+ said...

Hana & 周游:
你地呀,搞到我面紅呢.

我會再比多d心機寫架喇!*Hugs*

gloomy. u know who. said...

babe, i read all, ALL your posts in one day!

dont tell my boss...

C+ said...

THX DARL! It has been a lonely journey writing without you! You'll drop by every now & then yea!?

MISS U LOADS, I MEAN IT!

 
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