Meeting Copperfield (By 張大小姐)

上文提到，我跟張大小姐是心意相通的雙生兒．

以下是她於週一發給寶藥黨的電郵，Send於我文出街前的七分鐘．

現得張大小姐同意轉載，
希望各位細心欣賞，
非因你會發現我倆到底有幾邪靈地Twins，
而是因為，
這是一篇警訊．
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I hung up with my friend C. Pondering.

Not only do our menstruation cycles sync up after years of being good friends, we dress up in similar outfits when we meet up, even our relationships with men resembles one another. But, this isn't a piece about our psychic ability, this is a story about a week in Denver.

I have concluded you are a genuine jerk. You lied to my face with such ease and grace, it's unbelievable. You schemed and plotted, using all your assets (literally everything material wise and emotional wise) to achieve this plan of yours. Congratulations, master of deception. You are David Copperfield.

I am not asking for an essay or a lengthy heartbreaking conversation explaining why you ceased communication with me and have disappeared from the face of earth. I'm not even there physically to cause a scene or scar your oh so delicate heart. I am seven-thousand-four-hundred-seventy-eight miles away from you, with no direct flights from my point to your point, pleading for a reply through emails. I deserve a proper closure for what happened between us. Why? Because decent, mature, kind human beings do not turn away from situations like such, knowing fully that a simple "yes", "no", "hi", "ok" is all that's needed to comfort the other party and to put an end to things. And, maybe deep down inside, in my fucked up sense of rationality, I still think that you are a nice person and what you have shown me during that week wasn't a hallucination. No, it was real - the reality of you deceiving me.

You picked me up from Denver International Airport 9.30 in the morning on a Wednesday. Wearing a bright red shirt. Your favorite color. I was too nervous and excited to even look you straight in the eyes. You bought a GPRS system, so my visit would go as smoothly as possible. Unused to the functions on the little device yet you refused to let me teach you or touch the machine, because that means I could peek at the places you were planning for me to visit. You wanted them to be a surprise.

We argued on that Thursday. I stayed in the car throwing a tantrum, you went ahead to get take out. You took a long time, considering it was fast food. I never mentioned that I saw you from outside, and caught you trying to clamp a plushie from one of those claw machines. You failed in the end, but I teared up in joy, babe.

I woke up 3.50am, found you sitting beside me applying Benedril on my dime sized mosquito bites. You said, "Baby, you were scratching non-stop, I went and bought you some cream."

I would have been just as happy, if we had sandwiches in the car for dinner instead of sharing fondue on Monday evening. Sipping sauvignon blanc by the Trinchero family, feeding each other sizzling cubes of food, licking off the accidental droplets of cheese landing on you and on me, admiring the setting sun and its splendid colors in a private curtained booth in the restaurant. Chad, our waiter, assured us we would have absolute privacy after all the dishes were served to our table.

The view was amazing even if it was just overlooking some highway in Littleton. I thought, yea, I could leave my concrete jungles behind. Stop wearing Christian Louboutins. Give up those pretty Chloe dresses. Sell my sea view pad. Be thousands of miles away from my friends. For you, in the middle of butt fuck no where.

"I really care for you and I like you a lot, in case you didn't notice."
"Silly woman, of course I know. Come here to me."

I honestly don't understand how you did it, Asshole. The facial expressions, the dialogs, the actions, the manners, were all 10 out of 10, flawless. You really didn't have to go that far to please me if you were just trying to tap my ass. You knew I have already fallen for you. All you needed was to ask. No strings attached if you stated what exactly you were looking for in the first place. It's almost as if you are justifying breaking my heart into a million pieces in that sick and twisted mind of yours with all the niceness. You could have stopped all the sweetness that Wednesday I was leaving the base. On the way to the airport, you didn't have to ask me if I would stay a couple more days, just to wake from that week of dream a little later. That question melted my heart. You didn't have to pack a bag of popcorn for me and put it into my hand-carry secretly, in case I got hungry on the flight.

You were a great friend and a great listener, you made me laugh. You came back to your room between work breaks, just to show me your color changing eyeglasses on Skype because I had never seen them before. We talked for hours on the phone with you asking "Why is it so hard to hang up on you baby?" at the end of each of our conversations. You hadn't once disappointed me in anyway for the past 3 years we have known eachother, prior to the week.

"I will fly to Aurora from Hong Kong, stay for a week and see where it would bring us, William Jones."

I was so wrong.

PS ( Please substitute your name with any digusting male name pops up in your head, and change the location to HK and basically it will be my friend's version of "Meeting Copperfield".)

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唉，我既PS係：
各位姊妹，帶眼識人矣啦．

又，點解我個個朋友仔都勇我咁多？
自爆呢回事呢．．．．．．
Hm．．．．．